Olympic Games 2008 (Page 7 of 7)

But its going to be a big scandal when they find out all those dutch heroes are on doping drugs

That is a pretty weird theory, probably some bullshit invented by the NOC olympic comity to justify their dumbass-ness

Don't most people think the country that wins a medal sucks? Why would you do a business deal with a country that won more medals...that is the biggest bullshit I've ever heard...but yeah shit like that is probably true. Do people really care THAT MUCH about the olympics?

Sport is the most evil thing in the world, it is even more evil then war and global warming.

bof

Sports are good when you do it and are in the action. Seeing it on the TV with some beers and snacks, I never understood the interest...

he allways got picked last hehehe

My friend must have been bored at work - for those who don't know, Sunshine is a pretty slummy area in Melbourne

The Sunshine 2016 Olympic Games Bid

Sunshine has entered into the running for the 2016 Olympics, with such a well thought out plan I think they are in with a chance!

The Olympic Flame will be ignited by a petrol bomb thrown by a local of Sunshine wearing a counterfeit Fubu shirt, stolen Billabong board shorts & to keep with tradition a pair of trainers stolen from a randomly selected passenger on the Sydenham line.

100 METRE SPRINT
Competitors will start outside Mcdonalds Sunshine, and will have to hold a DVD & a Microwave (one in each arm) and, on the sound of the starter's gun, a Police dog will be released from a cage 10 metres behind the athletes.

100 METRE HURDLES
As above but with added obstacles, car bonnets, hedges, garden beds, fences, walls etc.

HAMMER THROW
Competitors in this event may choose the type of hammer they wish to use (claw, sledge etc). The winner will be the one who can cause the most grievous bodily harm to Toorak residents and their caravans driving past on their way to the Great Ocean Road within the time allowed.

SHOOTING
A strong challenge is expected from the men in this event. The first target will be a moving Police vehicle. In the second round, competitors will aim at the Sunshine Post Office Clerk, Mobil Petrol Station Console Operator or Bottleshop Attendant.

BOXING

Entry to the boxing will be restricted to husband and wife teams and will take place on a Friday night. The husband will be given 15 glasses of Bourbon and Coke at the West Footscray Tatts, while the wife wearing bike pants, an old T-shirt, and thongs will be told not to make him any dinner when he gets home. To charge him further she will ask him to remove the old commodore transmission from the bath.

CYCLING TIME TRIALS

The competitor will attend the Williamstown Shopping Centre where they will obtain a bicycle stolen from a Williamstown Christian school student, they will then be pitted against the clock. Bonus points will be awarded for a helmet, which would have been procured at the time of getting the bike.

MEN'S 50KM WALK
Unfortunately this is now cancelled, as organisers cannot guarantee the safety of anyone walking the streets of Sunshine.

GYMNASTICS
The Beam will be replaced by a strip of gutter along Green Point Rd, outside Centrelink. The event will commence at closing time - we expect some rather difficult dismounts to be performed on this apparatus. The floor routine will be conducted in the padded cell of the Melbourne Remand Centre.

CLOSING CEREMONY

Entertainment will include a bonfire made out of the Sunshine Primary School, accompanied by a local pub cover band. The Olympic Flame will be extinguished by the Local Mayor by urinating from the base of the spire in a cascading effect. The stadium (to be constructed within the local Coles shopping centre Carpark) will then be boarded up before local athletes break in to it and remove all the copper piping, electrical wiring and air conditioners.